More.

Although Winter is one of my favorite seasons, I can honestly say these last few weeks have definitely had me feeling extra emotional. It's been five days since the sun has shown its face in Houston. The temperatures have been well below average, and the sky has only been shades of grey..... 

The new year has been full speed ahead, with work holding steady and days flying by. We are already half way through January! My God! Time doesn't last as long as it used to.. I've been doing my best to hold on to those last sprinkles of magic from my New York adventure, but slowly the glitter is fading away and I find myself longing... longing for another journey, longing for another adventure. Just longing for more.

My friends and I visited a new church this past Sunday. I can honestly say it has been months since I've steadily attended the church I'm actually a member of. I used to faithfully attend service every Sunday, then my visits became more and more sparse until I was an official member of Bedside Baptist, watching services online every week. I still got the word, but I still feel as if something was missing from physically being in the sanctuary. 

The morning started off ugly. It was freezing cold, and rain was pouring. Perfect sleep in weather. Had it not been for a text from one of my friends, I probably would've stayed burrowed under the covers awaiting my standing date with Olivia and Elliott. But we soldiered on and were mightily blessed. 

"The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense."

Proverbs 27:9

I'm so happy my friends included me in their quest to find a new church home, because from the moment we walked in until the time we left I felt blessed. 

The pastor preached on the prayer of Jabez. I personally was not familiar with this verse of the bible, but it was preaching directly to us and our current situation in life. 

1 Chronicles 4:9

Jabez was more honorable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, saying, “I gave birth to him in pain.” Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, “Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain.” And God granted his request.

Jabez made the perfect requests of God. He asked for more. And not only did he ask for more, he asked to be happy with the more he was blessed with, in God's will. Because even though you ask for something, it may not be in God's will. That's not saying that you will never get blessed, because you will.... You just have to be happy with the blessing you receive.  Every human experience just is not for everybody. 

I've often found myself feeling guilty for wanting more out of life. I got the salary, but I still don't have the husband and find myself disappointed. Why are you still asking for more Fal? You should be happy with what you have. I am, but there is still more that I desire. And that's okay. 

We all oftentimes find ourselves wondering why it seems like others have been blessed more than we have. Well, just like Jabez was born out of pain, a lot of times we don't see the behind the scenes and pain others had to endure in order to get their blessings. No one has lived the perfect life, and despite what it looks like on Facebook, everyone has faced some form of heartbreak, or setback or challenge in life before they made it. And accordingly, sometimes it takes great pain to experience extreme pleasure and blessings in life. I've had my share of down times. I should definitely be more than confident that every blessing God has for me is still out there for my claiming. We just have to keep striving....

Live righteously, keep praying, and keep waiting. If it is in God's will for your life, it is on it's way. I just pray that I have the ability to be happy with whatever it is I'm blessed with. 

We just need to keep asking for more. It's not selfish, or ungrateful to desire to live your best life possible. The wait is the hardest part, but that's where faith comes into play. 

After church I had no choice but to smile for the rest of my rainy Sunday. I genuinely needed to receive that word.....

The work week is halfway over, and as I'm sitting here looking at the dreariness outside my window, I can't help but think about the more that is out there for me. 

We've been talking about trips all morning in our group chat... Now the only thing I need to work on is the more money I'll need to save up to take those trips, but that's a story for another day....

I can genuinely say that I'm happy with the "more."